Monday, June 9, 2008

{...reaching out...}

So after writing my insanely long, oft times incoherent 'infertility blog' I received this message in my inbox...

Hi McKenna,
I know a couple of people who you're friends with and they've talked about how cool you are, so I started looking at your blog. I think you're a clever writer, and I love how you'll just say how you're feeling instead of keeping it all bottled up. I just read your blog about infertility and it helped me so much to hear what you have to say. I've had two miscarriages and I feel guilty about a lot of things. I feel guilty that I hated going to church in Provo. I feel guilty that almost a year later I still cry at least every week. I have a 16 year old cousin who drinks, smokes, and doesn't even speak the same language as her boyfriend. Her healthy baby girl is being born in 3 weeks and I feel guilty that I refuse to go to her baby shower. Thank you for putting your emotions out there so that other people don't feel so alone in a subject that many people won't acknowledge.

I am constantly reminded of how 'secret' infertility is. So many women are dealing with infertility but don't express their pain because of fear, shame, maybe guilt. It's nice to know that I'm not alone, and that maybe, just possibly I am helping in some tiny way. Infertility traumatizes those it touches, and it is something you can't cope with unless you have a support group.
Sigh, so hard. So very hard.


The Wendler Family said...

Its true. That fact that you are open about it is wonderful! (and healthy too.) It has already blessed the life of another individual. I am glad you can share your raw emotion and feelings about your situation. You can be a support to others, and vice versa because what you have experienced. Losts of people may want to be there for people like your message-in-your-inbox friend, but who she really needs is someone who can relate to her situation, someone like YOU. :) hang in there!

Parrish Family said...

Kenna I am so amazed. By your struggles you are helping so many poeple. People you have never met and may never meet. Keep talking, people are listening and finding strength from it.

P.S. We should all get together sometime!

Tasha said...

Kenna thank you for sharing your story. I had no idea about half of that stuff going on in your life. It certainly gives us something to think about. And makes you realize you never know what life will throw at you in your future!

The Corbetts said...

I think your amazing and great. I love your blog aka reading it, you are awesome in that you put your thoughts right out there and it does help others. Thanks for being you miss being your neighbor.

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