Friday, July 18, 2008

{...ziplock vs glad...}

Cliff notes: More comments please, happy pills are doing their job, brains still mush and never trust a Ziplock bag. I'm going with Glad from now on.

Apparently only posting a 'Monday Playlist' every week is not going to keep my readers hanging around. I'll be honest, I thrive on knowing that my blog is read. I pour over all the comments I receive, which most of the time makes me want to blog more. I like getting every one's opinion. Maybe if ya'll would comment more or something I might blog more. Ever think about that?

So I have an update on the status of the story, 'Kenna goes on happy pills.' I can honestly say that I feel a difference in the past month. I'm on my second month of these little guys and I feel kind of bad that I was so anti before. I have more energy, it's easier to get up in the morning, work doesn't feel like such a burden, life in general doesn't feel like such a burden, and Josh says I'm less cranky which, let's be honest, is probably the most important development. I also feel very light today because I had a good session with Mrs. Shrink on Wednesday. I took a break for about 3 months but realized I needed the chat sessions and I wouldn't benefit until I made that decision. (Although Katie said she would be Mrs. Shrink for only $20 bucks...hmmm...anyone willing to bid lower?) It's refreshing to see a difference in how I feel (finally) and now I just need to get the health situations under control. I'm still having some serious headaches and other problems from the brains operation. Remember that nasty smell I talked about? I still get it whenever I blow my nose. It's disgusting. I get to see Paul K. Brains next Wednesday for yet another follow up. Cross your fingers for me.

There is a word I find myself using more and more these days. 'Compartmentalize.' I have never used this word much before, but I figure it must be growing in popularity in my vocabulary because I suck at it. 'What is this crazy talking about?' you might ask. Well, to put it simply (I hope this comes out simply, heaven knows I'm loooooong winded) I let all aspects of my life leak together which at times can be bad. Example: Infertility. (Yes I know, I know, it gets old to me too) I have let infertility leak into, maim and control almost all other aspects of my life. My self-esteem, my religious beliefs, my body perception, it's ALL messed up. Logically I am well aware that just because I have this trial doesn't make me any less of a person. I didn't do anything to cause my body to have it's most awesome freak out. BUT, sometimes logical thinking doesn't reign supreme. I feel worthless at times, frustrated that my body is far heavier than I would prefer, and so on and so forth. Is this completely normal and justifiable? I sure think so, but there comes a time when I have to put infertility in it's own Ziplock back separate from everything else. Actually, I have put it in it's own Ziplock, but it seems to be leaking EVERYWHERE. Maybe I should make the switch to Glad. Point being, this is something I really need to work on. Letting everything leak all over the place is no way to live, and no way to keep your refrigerator.

Until next time...

9 comments:

lauren said...

hey, i'm pretty much your shrink for free, so i should get some credit. ;)

i heart you.

Matt and Shell said...

hey, you did post again. okay, the world can go on. I must say I don't remember the Spongebob pic, the card yes, the contents, no. But I do like this post. One time a professor asked us why the Titanic sunk...we all replied "Because it hit an iceberg, duh." He said, "No, it sunk because it didn't have compartments. If it would have had compartments, the water would have only filled the portion of the ship that was damaged, not the entire ship, and the Titanic wouldn't have sunk." I really liked his analogy and I think of it often. It doesn't mean that I am always good at living in day-tight compartments (you know, not letting one bad day ruin the rest of the week), but at least I'm more aware of it now.

Tatum said...

McKenna you are so sweet! Thanks for your prayers for Matt's sis...you are probably one of the only people in the world that really know what she is going through and how she feels!
I am glad that you will stalk my blog...I need more "readers" as you call them! I will probably continue to stalk you too now!
Let's be honest, not only is Glad better, it's cheaper too! I love the yellow brand!
Keep us updated with how you are doing!

Tasha said...

Well stated Kenna! I like it!

The De Souzas said...

Wow, I really like the comment by "Matt and Shell" about the Titanic. I'm SOOOOO happy that you're noticing improvement Kenna. You feeling a little happier makes me feel a little happier. Love you.

The Wendler Family said...

McKenna- I love to read your blog! Thanks for keeping me and the rest of us updated. I am glad that the "happy pills" are helping. Isn't it amazing? I know, I was skeptic to. Couseling is great too! I think everyone can benifit from a bit of couseling- if they say that can't, they're lying. :) It is hard to keep all aspects of life seperated. You are doing much better with the mush than a lot of other people I know would do (including myself). It will get easier with time and hopefully with the swich to GLAD. :-D

Blogdor said...

Let's be honest though Kenna, most people's brains actually are pretty compartmentalized. The Mr. Tubby Massacre might have uncompartmentalized stuff. So what I'm saying is, you should forget compartmentalization, since it is physically impossible for your brain to do any way. Instead you should discriminate and segregate everything in your life. That's a great way to live. ...Right...That'll be $19.99

Cali said...

Hey Kenna, I'm glad you're feeling better too! Hey, you are not the only one who feels their body is heavier than they prefer. I actually just got a pass to 24 hr fitness, I would love to have a gym partner if you're interested!

Lisa said...

Kudos to you! I'm not as brilliant-minded or cool with sophisticated words, like many of your other readers are, but I'm proud of you and I love you. I'm glad you're doing well. Your happiness is important to me!

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