Friday, November 25, 2011

...a day of gratitude...

i find that each year it is harder to express how grateful i feel for the life i have been granted.  of course it is impossible to list each and every thing i have been blessed with, every piece of my life that is wondrous, even the parts that aren't so beautiful, in one post.


this is the part where i chastise myself for not writing about gratitude more. 

however, as customary, i would like to share with you what i feel truly grateful for this thanksgiving.

 photo by jenny wheeler.


first i am thankful for a loving and gracious God.  my life has been spared; physically, mentally and spiritually because i am cared for and looked after by a higher power.  i cannot look back on my life, especially the past five years, and not see His hand in all things.  even when i truly felt left alone to die in what i saw as never ending darkness, i didn't perish.  my heart truly wishes it could express adequately how i feel about the plan of salvation, the power of prayer, priesthood keys, the acceptance and forgiveness i am offered daily by a Heavenly Father who wants nothing more than my happiness.  while i have not completely understood His plan for me at times, i know that i always come out the victor.  i have been buoyed, i have been lifted, i have been carried.



now, how can i possibly write this post without expressing my love for studly?  exactly.  i cannot.  he is such a kind, loving man who has been through hell and back at my expense.  regardless of the fact that i am certifiably nuts, he wakes up beside me each morning, ready to face another adventure.  you see, they don't read off things like, 'brain tumor, still birth, pregnancy loss, adoption loss' in marital vows.  i feel so very grateful that, 'in sickness and in health; for better or for worse' was all encompassing, and that studly has stayed true to those vows.  i love him more than i ever imagined.




 
i am sure you are all slightly sick of hearing me say how grateful i am for my sweet son.  then again, there isn't a day that goes by that i don't look at his face and shed a few tears.  the gratitude i have for him, for his birth parents and families, runs so very deep within my soul.  he is the light in our home.  he is what i have dreamed about and prayed for.  how did i get so lucky?  i am humbled and the thought of the sacrifices that were made on his behalf that allowed him to come to our family.  i love my boog.  to the moon and back again.



family.  from my mom and dad, to studly's.  brothers, sisters; aunts, uncles and cousins.  they have surrounded me in time of need offering help, support and love.  i know for a fact that hundreds of prayers have gone up in my behalf from these individuals.  again, how lucky am i to have been placed in such an amazing family?  







 friends.  all of you.  those i see regularly, to those i've never met.  friends in australia to sri lanka.  from my home town of st. george to the beautiful states of the east coast.  to those who have sacrificed their time, talents, and love because they call me a friend.  those of you who have held my hand literally and figuratively.  who have seen way too much of me nude.  who have advocated for me.  who have had faith in me even when they probably shouldn't.  you know, i think this has been the most noticed compensation from God.  the people i've met because of my struggle have been those i need and want to keep in my life for years and years.  (lucky you)






medical technology and the leaps and bounds made daily in the medical field.  recently i had a friend say she told others i was, 'her miracle friend.'  while i don't count myself as one of those beautiful, pot of gold at the end of the rainbow kind of miracles, i do know that i am a miracle of sorts.  i have a confident team of doctors and nurses who have my best interests in mind.  most importantly, i have a bold team.  brain surgery and a complete abdominal hysterectomy by the age of 25 is bold, but it's a bold move that has saved my life.  as much as i complain about the medications i have to swallow, i will gladly do it.  they did not give up on me and wouldn't let me give up on myself.  even when i sat in the corner of the exam room crying my eyes out from another shot, another set back, another surgery, i was lifted up, dusted off, and often cut in to.  it's been worth it.  (if you are looking for an amazing ob/gyn who works with infertility, dr. russell smith at the alta view hospital is your guy)

i have a blessed life.  the good always outweighs the bad.  

so said by this turkey.  gobble gobble.  




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4 comments:

TeriAnn said...

Love ya Kenna. I am so grateful for you in my life.

Kristin said...

Loved this. :) I'm grateful for your example. I think you do a beautiful job.

Krista said...

And your friends are so grateful for you! Thank you for sharing your kick-a inspirational self with the world. :)

Cali said...

"Like"

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